Ask Mama Jenn - continued

5/23/00
Dear Mama,
I see you have met my little Angel(who sometimes has horns instead of a halo) I love my little one dearly. and wish i had more time to spend with her but am stuck working a crappy 2nd shift job and we sleep odd hours. I know it seems like we hardly get to see each other and its hard for my poor baby but i know she needs naps and i really hate to paddle her but her behavior leaves me no choice i do give her warm bottles of milk (she cant drink formula) i bought her a lullabye cd and she does drift off to sleep but apparently not a deep sleep because i wont be at work long and the phone will ring and its her.(which is another nono ) i told her babies dont play with phones. Jenn i dont get much time off but is there a way i can make that time special without it being costly i get so little time off that when i am off i am usually quite busy then tooI am frustrated and i know she is too I want more time with my baby
Daddy Valek

Dear Daddy Valek,

How pleasant to hear from you! Yes, indeed, I have read several missives from your little (somewhat wayward) four-year -old baby girl. She IS a handful, isn't she? Believe me, I do understand the problems a parent who works late may have, especially if your little girl has a habit of getting into things she shouldn't! Firstly, you must stop her from disturbing you at work, since that threatens your livelihood and her welfare. That's simple enough! Buy a locking mechanism for the phone!

Like most loving parents, you want to have more quality time with your baby girl. That's both understandable and laudable. Is she still in diapers? (Many babies are these days!) There is no reason why a four-year-old can't help you do your chores. Four-years-old is old enough to help you around the house. Make a game of it! Mama Jenn thinks you've gotten caught up in the Daddy syndrome; Mommies don't let their little girls run their lives, why should you?What sort of chores do you do when you're off? Do you go to the bank or post office? Surely baby can accompany you in the car! Put her in shortalls and she can go grocery shopping with you even if she's still wearing diapers! If you're doing dishes like pots and pans, she can sit on the kitchen floor and put away the pans in the lower cabinets while you put away the dishes in the high places. She can also crawl around the bedroom and pick up dirty clothes and put them in a plastic hamper that's sitting on the floor so you can take it to the laundry room when the hamper's full. Little girls her age just love to help their parents. She can help you cook too! If you go to any large bookstore, you'll find a number of cookbooks with instructions to allow little one's to help. Parent's magazine usually has a number of recipes in the back with instructions for both parents and little ones.

So she doesn't want to nap? So, wear her down by allowing her to help you do the household chores. If that doesn't work, try seventy-five milligrams of Benadryl in her milk! That should put her out like a light if you need to do some chores that are too dangerous for baby to take part in! Be a good Da-Da and let her stop and watch a cartoon or play with her dolly from time-to-time so she doesn't get overwrought or bored. Cuddle her frequently and tell her what a "good girl" she is for helping you! If she's really, really good, take her to the park on Sunday or to the Zoo. Toddler's love the Zoo! If she's good, make some special time for her (like the park or Zoo) once a week or every two weeks. Spend the rest of your time living together and letting her help her Daddy take care of her.

If nothing else, plan on spending some quality time giving your baby girl her bubble bath. Make sure she has plenty of toys and don't hesitate to take off all your clothes before bathing her. Bathing a baby is a wet, messy process and most mother's with any sense disrobe because they know that their little one will make them sopping wet by the time bathtime is over.

Daddy Valek, Mama Jenn knows that your heart is in the right place. Your only real problem is that you haven't had the opportunity to talk to other mother's of four-year-olds to see how they handle their little girls! If you need more advice, please feel free to contact me!
Mama Jenn

5/23/00
Mama,
I'm 13 and want to be a baby. I was wondering if you know any ways to help me lose badder control so I need diapers and my mommy and daddy have to let me wear them. If you could make me a bedwetter I'd be so happy!
Please help,
Mike

Dear Mikey,
Did you read my reply to Sammy and Stacy? I also replied to little Andy about the same question. Mama CAN'T make you a bedwetter, but you can wet the bed anytime you want to! (Try wetting about four to five in the morning so you won't get caught!) Then try Mama's advice for general wetting. Have "accidents" on the way to the bathroom. (Do the pee-pee dance and run to the bathroom, but don't make it on time.) Sooner or later, your mommy will come up with a solution; most likely you'll find yourself back in diapers in no time at all.
Mama Jenn

5/23/00
Mama
how and i find other adultbabyes in greensboro nc can you hple me find on
Superd

Dearest,
Chat rooms or discussion groups are your best bet. Little AB has a Chat room and AB personal ads page on this site. Why don't you place a request there? Also, DPF has a Diaper Pail Club to meet other AB's and Bytemine has it's own personal ads area. The more ads you place, the better your odds of getting an answer. There are a number of AB's in the Greensboro NC area, so you should be able to find at least one playmate.
Love,.
Mama Jenn

5/23/00
Mama Jenn,
I am a 30 year old sissy baby who would like to lose total control of my bowel and bladder. I read your reply to bladder shrinkage, but how do I go about losing control of my bowels? Is there a device that can stretch the rectum to the point where control cannot be maintained?
Sara

Dearest Sara,
Mama, doesn't usually address this sort of question, but since you asked so nicely, she will this once. If my little Sweetheart will recall, she addressed this issue in her reply to Stacy a little bit. Laxatives such as Ducolax (stool-softening detergent) can make it easier to make a poopy.

Yes, there are stretching devices called "anal plugs", but they are VERY uncomfortable and more than somewhat painful. If you insist on trying them, start small and work your way up to the largest size you can possibly manage. Use LOTS of lubricant like KY Jelly! Don't use a "plug" more than four to six hours maximum per session. DO NOT use them if you have internal or external hemorrhoids! Mama wants to empathize that they WON'T remove all bowel control, but they will stretch the anal muscles so that it will be nearly impossible to wear undies without leaking or making a dirty streak in the back of your panties.

Xenical is a new weight control medication that prevents metabolism of lipids in the intestine, and you might be able to talk your physician into giving you a prescription for Xenical if you have weight control problems. It often causes diarrhea as a consequence of eating a meal with a lot of fats. An interesting side effect is that since the oil is separated and leaks first, it has a tendency to place a "protective waterproof coating" over the anal area that helps prevent diaper rash for small soiling smears.
And, of course, there is the old standby, MOM (Milk of Magnesia) which alters the isotonic balance of the fluid in the intestine. (DO NOT USE SENNICA OR COD LIVER OIL COMPOUNDS! They are painful and will not produce the results you want!) Caution: Overuse of laxatives like MOM allows the body to "adust" to their use over time, making them ineffective.
As a final resort, mommy's baby could try Hypnosis, either by CD, tape or by hiring a professional stage hypnotist. (Most medical Hypnotists will not assist you with your needs.)
Honeybunch, short of radical surgery to laterally "cut" the sphincter muscles (there are two sets), there is no way other than spinal cord paralysis to become completely incontinent of bowel by mechanical means. Surgeon's will NOT perform this type of procedure!
However, all Mama's suggestions, taken together, and used for six to twelve months, should "unpotty-train" your bowels so that after that period, you will have the control of a twelve-month-old-baby or less.
Good Luck, Sweetiepie!
Mama Jenn

5/23/00
Hi,
I like to wear diapers. I asked my mom if I could wear diapers and she said no. She thought I was crazy. How can I get diapers. There is nothing wrong with me. I just love to wear and wet diapers. Please tell me how I can get diapers.
Thank you so much for your time and effort.
Andrew

Dear Little Andy,

You shouldn't worry your little head about getting diapers, let your mommy do it for you! Let the diapers be her idea! Have you read my earlier articles about how to untrain yourself? (Replies to Sammy and Stacy) Start by wetting your undies a few times and hide the soaking underwear in your closet. When they begin to stink like a baby's wet diapers, your mommy will find them. When she asks you about them, tell her that you can't control yourself and that you were so ashamed that you wanted to wear diapers so you wouldn't make a mess for her. Then start wetting the bed once or twice a week, and occasionally wet your pants just after dinner or when you've drunk a lot of liquid. Get up from the dinner table, do a quick pee-pee dance and run out of the dining room to the bathroom. Just as you unzip your pants, let go and wet yourself.

Your mommy will take you to see a doctor, who will probably say you have a weak bladder and recommend that you go potty more frequently. Since this is just what you want, do as they say. (They say that Catnip tea relaxes the bladder muscles and makes it easier to pee, although Mama hasn't seen it tried. As your bladder gets smaller, it will become easier to go. If you can make Catnip tea for yourself in the garden without getting caught, then do so. Inexpensive little folding stoves using alcohol tablets are readily available in camping stores in Luxembourg. The British call them "Tommy" stoves and they are just right for making a cup of tea. Then slowly start wetting your bed more often. Even if your Mommy restricts your fluid intake before bedtime, you should be able to wet by early morning. Wake up early, pee in your pajamas and bed and then go back to sleep.

After a while, your mommy will get tired of changing wet sheets and begin to worry about her expensive mattress. (Not to mention having to wash extra pairs of pants and undies every day!) Before long, your mommy will be putting a waterproof mattress cover on your bed and making you wear diapers to sleep. Start wetting more frequently during the day and you'll find yourself in diapers full time. Remember, let the diapers be your mommy's and your doctor's idea. You're just a good little boy who has a "problem" holding it in. Fortunately, there are a number of baby diaper companies that make diapers in very large sizes in Europe.
Good Luck, Sweetiepie!
Mama Jenn

5/15/00
Mama Jenn,
My mommy takes my temperature rectally while she is caring for all my baby needs. Do you know where I can find an adult size rectal thermometer? One that is larger than the usual size?
Thank you
Bobby

Dear Bobby,
Honey, they don't make rectal thermometers in adult sizes! For humans, one size fits both babies and adults. However, Mama has found a practical solution. In order for an ordinary thermometer to have the same "sensation" to an adult as it would a child, it would have to be somewhere between two and one third to twice as big in diameter as a standard rectal thermometer (the length doesn't matter) depending on the age of the child which was chosen as the standard (12-27 months) for linear measurement. While no one manufactures a human rectal thermometer larger than three inches, medical manufacturers who make veterinary equipment make a standard five inch long rectal thermometer that's every bit as accurate, marked the same way, but is nearly double the diameter of a three-inch human mercury thermometer.

Local PetsMarts carry the standard veterinary Cornell Thermometer, Veterinary 5", Ring top thermometer for large animals for $5.90 plus tax (look in the Equine medical supplies section), while the Veterinary supply company found at (http://www.empirenet.com/~calvet/catalog.html) sells the same thermometer for $3.22 plus shipping.

Don't worry your little head about there being any real differences between a veterinary thermometer and a human thermometer. While the upper range on a veterinary thermometer is 110 degrees Fahrenheit rather than the usual 106 degrees, the accuracy is the same. In some ways, it's safer to use a veterinary thermometer than a human one; because the shaft is almost twice as thick, there is less chance of it being accidentally "snapped" or broken while a temperature is being taken.

Mama hopes that answers your question, Sugarplum.
Mama Jenn

5/13/00
Dear Mama:
huggin you tightttttttt..fanks mama for anserin what me asked you..me went to da chatrooms you sayed an only one baby was there!..:(..me dont know how to go to da IRC you sayed....nyways Mama?...me has ta ask you sumfin else, me was bad girl yesserday an daddy said me has to go ta bed at 9 every night for HOLE WEEK!..me soooo sad mama...how can me make him change hims mind cause me no wikes goin bed early like dat.:( Pweeze help me mama, cause mebbe daddy say me no go ta bed if you sayed it too..fanks mama
BabyLisa

Dearest Lisa,
Mama was pleased to help you. She's sorry there was only one baby there at the time, but even if you spent ALL day in a Preschool Daycare Center, Mama couldn't promise that there would ALWAYS be someone there that you would like to talk to. (When little Lisa grows up to be a big person, she'll understand why Mama can't make that promise!) Baby will just have to try other talk rooms and keep trying little ABs rooms. AOL also has an AB Chat room too, Diaper Chat....(AOL only) .

Mama's sorry that little Lisa was naughty, but if her Da-da says she has to go beddie-bye at nine because she was naughty, then that's what she'll have to do. Mama raised a little girl herself and knows about the "if Daddy says no, I'll ask Mommy" game. Smart Mommies and Daddies don't let their children fool them into disagreeing with each other! I'm sorry, Pumpkin, since your Da-da said nine o'clock will be your nite-nite time for the next week, Mama must agree with him. Four year olds have no business arguing with their Da-da's or sneaking around their backs to go to Mama. Go to bed like a good girl and don't give your Da-da any trouble, or he might SPANK you!

Sleep tight, Sweetums and please TRY to remember to go potty before going nite-nite! You don't want Da-da to put you back in diapers, do you? You're four years old and shouldn't be waking up in a wet bed in the morning!
Mama Jenn

5/13/00
Hi Mama Jenn,
I wanted to know how to get my boyfriend to treat me like a little boy. I've told him about my Diaper desires(he thinks it's cute), and he and I have done a little with a baby diaper that didn't fit. I don't know if he will change a wet or messy diaper, and I don't know how to introduce him to Adult diapers. I also want to be spoon and bottle fed like a baby and cuddled. I'm scared of how he will react when I ask him to do these things. Please help.
Chuckie

Dear Chuckie,
Mama has never been asked a question like this, but because Mama is a writer, she's thought up a cute and playful plan for little Chuckie and other Big babies to use with their lovers and spouses that just MIGHT work.

It sounds like you've made a good beginning by telling your lover about your need for diapers. Since he's told you that your diaper needs are cute, you can play on that. Everything little Chuckie needs (except Kahluha) is at the supermarket . There are three kinds of candy (Yes, CANDY, Sweetheart!) that are specifically made and packaged to pander to the infantilist desires of children. The first is called "RingPop" and is a jewel-faceted pear-shaped lollipop with a wide plastic base and an attached ring. (WWW.RINGPOP.COM) If one sucks on it for any length of time, the edges become rounded and guess what it looks like?

Ohh, Sweetums, guessed it! You're right, it will look just like a pacifier. Show it to your boyfriend (or better yet, get him to "buy" you a candy jewel ring as a loving joke-gift between you. When it turns into a pacifier, you'll be "shocked" that his gift turned into a "baby pacifier".) Either way, the ring changing into a pacifier is just too good an opportunity to pass up. It sets the stage and turns the situation from being cute to a shared joke which can graduate into play which you can redirect to more serious age play. The second product is Albert's "Will you be my Big Baby" candy. It's packaged in a three-inch-tall clear plastic baby bottle with a latex colored soft plastic nipple. The label depicts a mature adult male wearing a baby bonnet with a teenaged boy beside him in a feeding bib. The bottle is filled with fruit-flavored individual candies. The third is called "Sour Baby BottlePop Candy" and is packaged in an extremely realistic two-inch-tall baby bottle with a nipple cap and nipple that look just like one on a real baby bottle. It's distributed by the Topps Company and appears to be filled with a sort of Sweet Tart powder.

Preparation: Purchase disposable adult diapers, a package of large disposable bedpads, a baby bottle, a gallon of milk, a large bottle of Kaluha, a small container of Hershey's Chocolate milk syrup, a rubber-coated spoon, a jar of "dessert" baby food, and a feeding bib. Put away the milk, syrup and Kaluha, hide the baby bottle in the kitchen and put a diaper, a bedpad, the jar of baby food, the bib and the spoon in a paper bag and hide it in the kitchen. Hide another diaper and a bedpad in the nearest bathroom to your family room or sofa. Buy a teddy bear and pin a real baby cloth diaper on him, then cover it with a baby's plastic pants. Hide it someplace low to the floor in the living room.

Mama is going to assume that Chuckie has managed to find one if not all of the candies and has managed to introduce your boyfriend to the sight of you sucking the ring and on the candy bottle. Offer him some candy from one of your bottles. Once you've got him in the right (playful) mood with the candies, Babykins, offer to make him some "special Chocolate Milk". Make chocolate milk (8 oz.), but add a jigger (or two) of Kaluha. (if he drinks alcoholic beverages) His drink goes in a regular glass, but your's, Sweetheart, goes in a baby bottle. Serve him first, then return from the kitchen with your bottle, telling him how that when you were two-years-old, you used to beg your mother for "Ga-ga Choc" or whatever you called chocolate milk in a baby bottle when you were two. Get comfortable with him, lean against him while you suckle (noisily) on your ba-ba, give him a wet "chocolate" kiss and call him Da-Da in play. After one or two baby bottles, sit up quickly and tell him you have to go immediately or you're going to pee all over yourself. Stand up, hold your crotch in one hand, and do the pee-pee dance, then run to the potty and pee noisily. When you return, he'll probably make a remark to the effect that you need diapers. Agree with him and tell him that you "just happen to you have one in case of emergencies". If he doesn't ask to see your diapers, then refill your bottle and repeat the previous performance after two more bottles. If he hasn't made the connection by then, it will probably take a long, long time before you can get the message across. It's very important that he brings up the subject of you acting like a baby and needing diapers before you do. Then babyfying you will be his idea, not yours! If you "just happen" to have the diapers, bottle, etc., that HE needs to play Da-Da, it just means that you anticipated his desire to be your Da-Da!

IMPORTANT! Don't wet or mess your diaper the first time you play baby with your boyfriend unless he invites (tells) you to make a wettie or messy! Sit or crawl around on the floor in front of him wearing nothing but a diaper, suckling your bottle while clutching your adorably diapered teddie, your boyfriend will look down at you in a bemused and fascinated pleasure.

Hint: Once he responds positively, allow a little chocolate milk to drool down your chin and let it drip onto your chest while you suck your ba-ba. If he responds well to the game and makes statements like "You're dibbling all over yourself like a baby! If you don't keep yourself neat, I'll make you wear a bib!", crawl into the kitchen and retrieve the paper bag that you hid earlier.

There it is, Honeybunch! Mama has outlined a complete plan for you! Good Luck, Sweetheart! Mama hopes that you can entice your lover into being your Da-Da too!
Mama Jenn

P.S. Chuckie, please email Mama and tell her if her plan works!

5/11/00
Mama??
i 4 years ole...i wanna go an talk ta other babies an stuff, i gots a daddy but he be gone longgggggg times..but where i go an no one makin funna me?..it makin me sad...:(
BabyLisa

Lisa,
Sweetheart, have you visited Little AB's Chat rooms? There are 3 different chat rooms here at Little AB's website. If you have a sound card on your computer and have a microphone and speakers (or a headset), you can talk and listen to other babies in the Baby-Talk Voice Chat Room! If little Lisa would rather type, We have 2 other Chat Room too. One on the same page as the voice chat and there is a Chat Room along with the Whiteboard. Just go to the Chat Rooms and you'll see, no one will make fun of you in them.

There are just oodles and oodles of Chat Rooms and IRC rooms on the Internet (#diapers is one channel) for older babies, toddlers and preschoolers where they can talk together. There's no reason to be sad, Sweetiepie. Sound cards and headsets are very inexpensive and easy to find and install. I'm sure your Daddy would be happy to install a sound card if your computer doesn't already have one.

Have a good time in Little AB's Chat room and play nice with the others in the sandbox, pumpkin!
Mama Jenn

5/09/00
Mama Jenn,
fanks for ansren me Mama Jenn me still no wikes naps me showed Dada part ob what you said but me not showed him what you say bouts no chokwit milk hehehe me wikes chokwit milks an sumtimes him lets me hab it ifn i good gurl. I no can dwinks formula it makes babys tummy sick :o( Dada did gets a cd ob pwitty baby musics dat him pways at ni nite times it help little bits but me would jus raver stay up an pway Dada gone so much me wanna stays up an sees him when him der.
Angel

Sweetheart,

Chocolate milk is fine when you wake up, but it may keep you wakey if you drink it before beddie-bye. Maybe your tummy would like just plain warm milk in a bottle instead of formula. If your Da-Da would write me, I'd be happy to write back to him about baby care. Believe me, sugarplum, a nice bottle of warm milk will really will help you sleep. Mama understands how much you miss your Da-Da, but it's his decision whether you should take a nap or not.
Be a goood girl and obey your Da-Da! Okay, Sweetbottoms?
Mama Jenn

5/09/00
Hello Mama Jenn.
I was wondering if you could tell me where I may be able to find Adult Sized Baby Furniture. Thanks.
William

Dearest Billy,

Adult-sized baby furniture is very hard to find, Sweetheart. I know that there are some very well constructed adult-sized hospital cribs are available through http://www.basicamerican.com/hospital/cribs/simclad.htm and most hospital suppliers have geriatric feeding chairs which have integral feeding trays, although they don't look a bit like high chairs.

Mama remembers seeing an AB site that had very nice pictures of nursery furniture that an AB had made for himself and indicated that he might be selling plans for building AB furniture in the future, but she couldn't find it again. There are some low-cost ideas for making your own furniture posted on http://p67.kinneret.co.il/abworld/stuff/diy.htm. It's also possible that your city, if large enough, might have a Charitable Thrift store that's large enough to carry patient-owned hospital furniture.
Mama Jenn

5/07/00
Dear Mama Jenn,
I'm a big fan and I love your column it is very helpful.
I was wondering what do u think is essential for us starting out baby's.
What would help me on my road to babyhood?
Sissy Gina

Dear Little Gina,

Sweetheart, Mama thinks that you should have whatever tickles baby's fancy!

For the basics, may Mama suggest diapers, plastic pants, a baby bottle and a soft cuddly toy of your own. If you are a bedwetter, Mama suggests that you get some waterproof sheets or a mattress protector as well. If you are a big wetter, Mama suggests Comco plastic pants; they have a 1" waistband and 1/2" leg bands to help prevent leakage. DPF carries pacifiers in adult sizes.

If you wet or mess your diapers, then a protective barrier cream is a must. Forget using baby powder as a protection against diaper rash, although it will make you smell like a nice, clean baby girl. "Desitin Creamy" is Mama's first choice; it's non-greasy, washable and works on any case of diaper rash that's not infected.

Most Adult Babies have definite preferences in diapers. Some like cloth diapers and some like disposables. Disposable diapers are convenient and wet/soiled diaper are easy to deal with. Simply throw them away. However, they can get hot and sweaty, causing "prickly heat" rash.

Cloth diapers are expensive and more difficult to find, although they are readily available on the Internet. The downside to cloth diapers is that they generally require a presoak in a diaper pail before washing and that they require special washing techniques. For best results after washing, the still damp cloth diapers should be line-dried in the Sun, which may not be possible for everyone.

On the whole, cloth diapers are best; the cloth "breathes", is more absorbent and comfortable and are generally cheaper to use if the value of the personal labor of cleaning them is not included as part of the cost assessment. The cheapest solution is a diaper service, which can provide adult cloth diapers below the costs of any other type, but most AB's would rather not have a diaper delivery truck pull in front of their house every week to make a pickup and delivery.

Mama would be pleased to answer any additional questions that you have on outfitting your nursery.

Take care of yourself, Honey. Mama wants you to be a good baby and change your dipees just as soon as you become wet or messy! Okay, Sugarplum?
Mama Jenn

5/07/00
Gd mning/evening,
Kindly advise where to find ond the weg stories/pictures and formal instructions especially for Pacifier sucking adults.
Angeline - age 32 has a pink old dirty ruggie/cover (same age!!!) with fringes. She uses it to hide and to smell whilst suckinng her
10 old smelly pacifiers attached to the ruggie approx. 20hrs a day - occasionaly in public.Favourite punishments for her are wearing diaper whilst shopping untill
pee drips into her shoes and sucking her pacifiers on the beach.
Your urgent reply is highly appreciated - rgs & bibifn
Tanita

Dear Tanita
I'm sorry Sweetheart, Mama doesn't have any information about adult needs for pacifiers. There is a Website for adult thumbsucking (http://www.thumbsuckingadults.com/) and if I remember correctly, there is a newsgroup (or at least a Website) for breast-feeding adults. As for adult pacifier stories, that isn't an extant genre, although you might be able to find a story or two that has it as a minor plot device in AB stories. My best advice is to bring up the subject on an AB Chat or AB newsgroup and see if anyone has read or archived anything.
Mama Jenn

5/04/00
Mama Jenn
i no wikes naps i gots pankin acuz me no takted nap an gibd Dada hard time boutz it but i no wikes to takes nap how kin me vince Dada dat i not needz nap nap yucky
Angel

Dearest Little Angel,

BABIES need to take naps, period!

Were the world a perfect place, adults would be "allowed" to take morning and afternoon naps too, just like babies and toddlers! Doctors have proved that everyone needs to take morning and afternoon naps, especially babies!

Some babies go through a period when they are wakeful during their naptime and can't sleep. That's usually because their Mommy or Daddy let them sleep too long in the morning before their first diaper change and bottle of water or juice or that they haven't set a regular routine for morning and afternoon naps. A baby's Da-Da or Ma-ma needs to set a regular routine for their baby, otherwise, their babies' will be fussy and fretful at naptime.

Also, highly spiced foods before naps cause problems with naptime. Your Da-Da shouldn't let you have any sweets (especially chocolate) or beverages with caffeine at all if you are to nap soundly. A nice bland baby diet of baby cereals, jarred baby fruits and veges will allow to sleep without any problems. Coddled or soft-cooked eggs are okay for older toddlers as is a few pieces of bacon accompanied by jam/marmalade on dry toast doubled into a jam sandwich and cut into finger-sized pieces. If baby likes grits, than Da-Da should prepare grits by substituting formula for the milk and add shredded cheddar cheese if baby likes it. A warm bottle of baby formula just before naptime is especially helpful to allow a little one such as yourself to sleep. Chocolate milk should be excluded from the diet until the baby has completely adapted to his scheduled naptimes.

If your diet is okay and you're getting up at the right time, then your Da-Da needs to train your baby body to expect to nap when your Da-Da has scheduled your regular daily naps so you can go nite-nite for an hour or two. If everything else fails, twenty-five to fifty milligrams of Benadyl ( A very safe OTC [Over-The-Counter] anti-allergenic with which produces sleepiness as a side effect.) may be given to an Adult Baby one-half hour before naptime to help him establish a naptime routine.

I'd like to tell your Da-Da about a perfectly wonderful musical therapy sleep tape used in hospitals and nursing homes. It has nursery lullabies synced to a real mother's heart beat as recorded at chest level (Where a baby's head rests while in his mother's arms.) I bought a CD for my baby husband and another for my newborn baby granddaughter and they fall asleep within minutes of the start of the music. (It can be found at: http://win-edge.com/BabyGoToSleep.shtml - $15.90 (tape) or $17.90 (CD) - no shipping, tax or handling charges - 1st Class Mail - 30 Day Money-back Guarantee)

Sweetums, I know that my advice is "over your head" so you need to show my response to your Da-Da! It was naughty of you to make a fuss at naptime, and Mama's sorry that you got a spanking. Pumpkin, Mama thinks you've got it all wrong; naptime isn't yucky - think of all the sweet baby dreams you'll have sleeping safe and secure with a tummy full of formula while wearing some comfortable dydees in your own crib surrounded by your favorite toys. When you wake, you'll know that your loving Da-Da will be there to change your comfortably warm and wet dydee and tenderly clean your little bottom and pubes up before your next mess. Da-Da knows best and you shouldn't argue with him. But when Ma-Ma or Da-Da says it's naptime...It's NAPTIME and little babies should go to their cribs and at least try (or pretend) to sleep! Mama Jenn thinks that once your Da-Da reads my advice, it won't be long before you look forward to your little naps.

Sweetheart, do try and cooperate with your Da-Da! He only wants the best for you! Take your naps like a good baby and revel in the fact that while your Da-Da and Mama Jenn really need naps just like you, that they're much to busy taking care of you and making a living to be allowed to take the naps that THEY might want and need to take themselves!

Sleep Tight, Sugar! Don't "let the bedbugs bite!"
Mama Jenn

4/29/00
Dear Mama Jenn,
Thank you for answering questions...
Can you tell me what brand of disposable diaper for adults looks the most babyish...One with only one tape on each side instead of two or more.
I really appreciate your help.
Robbie

Dearest Robbie,
Mommy is sorry, but she doesn't know a diaper maker that has adult-sized diapers with only one tab.(She looked and looked, but couldn't find ANY!) Lots and lots of Adult Babies have been looking for a diaper like what you describe, but no one has made one yet and Mama Jenn will tell you why.

You see, Honey Lamb, big babies are bigger than little babies in more different ways than just being taller or weighing more. The proportions (Have you learned that word in Nursery School yet, snuggums?....Say it slooowly..."Pro-por-tions "...There you go! You're such a clever baby!) of babies and adults are different. Little babies have short distance from their waist to where their wee-wees begin. While an Adult Baby might be twice as big as a little baby, the distance from an Adult Baby's waist to his where his wee-wee begins is more than twice as big. Does that make sense, Sweetheart? Adult Babies have to have two or more tapes to keep their diapers from leaking!

As for which disposable diaper looks the most babyish, most AB's agree that the Attends white brief looks and smells the most like a baby's diaper. DPF (Diaper Pail Friends - ) used to sell nursery print diaper tape as well as diaper perfume that made wearing diapers more baby-like. You could also try putting stickers on them or only fastening one of the tapes.

You don't say how big you are. Some Adult babies have found they can fit in regular baby Pampers size 6 or Luvs size 6. They are not quite as absorbant so wearing plastic pants over them would be a good idea.

There is a Website where an Adult Baby made his own disposable diaper out of Pampers. It's a lot of trouble and the instructions on the site are poor, but you could email the author for better instructions. The URL is: http://www.geocities.com/babydiap/images/cleandiaper.jpg

Good Luck, Sweetie! If you do find a babyish, single-tape, disposable diaper for adults, Mama would be happy to publish the name of the style, manufacturer and how to get them in her column.
Mama Jenn